1. Psychoeducation: what illness does to the mind

The stress response is doing its job

A diagnosis registers as a threat, so the body does what it does with threats: adrenaline, faster heart, tight muscles, hyper-alert attention, poor sleep and poor digestion. That is not you falling apart — it is an ancient system responding to danger it cannot run away from.

The problem is that this system was built for short emergencies. Illness is a long one, so the system stays switched on and starts producing exhaustion, irritability and blunted feeling.

Thoughts, feelings, body, behaviour

These four feed each other in a loop. A thought ('the pain means it's spreading') triggers fear, which tightens muscles, which increases pain, which strengthens the thought.

You cannot order a feeling to stop. But you can enter the loop at the thought, the body or the behaviour — which is exactly what the rest of these modules do.

What is normal after a diagnosis

• Two to four weeks of shock, disbelief and difficulty taking information in.
• Vivid recall of the moment you were told, replaying uninvited.
• Mood swinging between denial, terror and periods of feeling completely fine.
• Trouble concentrating and remembering — 'I read the same page five times'.
• Searching for a cause: what did I do, what did I miss.

When normal distress becomes something more

• It has been more than a month and the intensity has not started to fluctuate.
• You cannot function — not eating, not sleeping, not going to appointments.
• You feel hopeless most of the day, most days.
• You are using alcohol or medication to get through.
• You are having thoughts of ending your life.