Loss & bereavement
Returning to work
Most people go back long before they are ready, and then discover the second week is harder than the first.
Before you go back
- Ask about phased return, reduced hours or lighter duties for a defined period.
- Decide what you want colleagues to be told, and ask one person to tell them.
- Agree a signal or a place to go if you need ten minutes.
- Expect concentration and memory to be poor for a while; write more down than usual.
- Avoid major work decisions in the early months if you can.
Handling the awkwardness
Some colleagues will avoid you because they are frightened of saying the wrong thing. A short prepared line helps everyone: 'Thank you — it's hard, but being back is good for me.'
You do not owe anyone the details, and you are allowed to change your answer daily.
If work is where you hide
Work can be genuinely restorative — structure, purpose, company. It becomes a problem when it is the only place you exist and there is no time when grief is allowed.
Book one thing a week that has nothing to do with work or with the loss.
Afya Companion offers education and self-help support. It does not diagnose, treat or replace care from your doctor, nurse, psychologist or dietitian. If something in your health changes, speak to your care team.